The Coastal Post - September, 1996

You Can't Cheat An Honest Man

BY KIRBY FERRIS

Another gem from W.C. Fields: "Never give a sucker an even break." Apparent non sequiturs to what is written below? Somehow, I don't think so.

You are walking down the street. You've just cashed your paycheck. Your wallet/purse feels fat and happy. I come up to you and stick a .357 right under your nose. I command: "Gimme your paycheck." You hand over your wallet. I take 30% of the money out of the wallet and hand the rest back to you. As I turn and walk away, I yell back over my shoulder: "Don't worry. I'm going to spend some of this on a good cause."

As soon as your pulse rate lowers, your state of mind is: a) Fury. You have just been robbed at gunpoint. You call the cops; b) You are thankful that I only took 30% of your hard-earned money. And you don't bother to call the cops; c) You are completely satisfied with the entire affair because I told you I was going to spend the money that I stole from you on a good cause. And you don't call the cops.

Ladies and Gentlemen, what I have described above is the Federal Income Tax. There is absolutely no difference in the modus operandi. The only difference is that you can call the cops on a common mugger, but you can't call the cops on the Internal Revenue Service. They "police" themselves. Or it will take far more expense (and a miracle) to get your money back through the court system than most of you can afford.

We have given the government permission to steal from us because our ancestors allowed the 16th Amendment to the Constitution to become law. (The 16th Amendment wasn't lawfully ratified by three-fourths of the States. But that's another story.) Back in 1913, the government only stole from the "rich guys." So the huge majority of Americans weren't touched. In fact, they felt a snide little satisfacition that the "fat cats" were getting gouged. We allowed our morality to become relative. A crime against a wealthy man became less heinous than a crime against a poor man. And, because there were far fewer wealthy voters than poor voters, the law stayed in effect. In fact, the thieves, being clever, realized if they cut the majority in on a slight bit of the action (government "programs") there was the likelihood that legalized theft would become a permanent fixture in American politics.

Now, the rich aren't stupid. Putting envy aside, one must admit that it takes brains, determination, cunning and discipline to make lots of money. It may not take honesty, but it takes smarts. So the smart rich guys grabbed control of the lawmakers who were spewing out all these tax schemes and simply built loopholes into the Income Tax system. That's why the Internal Revenue Code is now twice as thick as the New York City phone directory!

So some of us dummies are still thinking that the rich guys are getting gouged. Wrong. The burden began to fall on the upper middle class, because they didn't have the legislative juice to diddle with the tax codes. Then the upper middle class began to groan loudly and make angry noises at Congress. And so Congress "eased their burden" and dropped the Income Tax burden even further down the economic scale. Into the middle class. The trick to this balancing game was to attempt to always make a majority of voters think that they were getting something for nothing. Oh yeah, the government used a nice-sounding word to describe this: progressive. A "progressive income tax." Now doesn't that make you feel better? You want to be "progressive," don't you? Aren't you all for "progress"?

You see, we think that we can give permission to the government to steal from one class of people and not end up being victimized ourselves. This is the height of folly.

But the thieves are not stupid. The plan is to get a majority of voters on welfare or employed by the government and paid by taxpayers' money. Are you going to vote to end your welfare check? Or your paycheck with the United States Department of Turtle Flatulence Evaluation? No way, dude. So automatically you don't want to see the income tax disappear. You don't want to see government become smaller. It would cost you your freebies or your job. So you piss and moan along with all the rest of the peasants. But you never really apply the heat to change the system, do you?

You keep buying into this socialistic system by voting for Socialist Party "A," the Democrats, or Socialist Party "B," the Republicans. Or maybe you are taking a closer look at Mr. Perot's "reform" socialism. The trouble is that your children will bear the weight of your vacillating. Think about it. Think about how we have legalized plunder in America.

Oh yeah. Pay your income taxes. You'll get your ass kicked if you don't. But while you're cutting that check, take the time to read up on what the Libertarian Party has to say about all this.

One final point. Excessive taxation fomented the American Revolution And an attempt at "gun control," at Lexington, set it off. There is nothing new under the sun.